Starting June 22, 2013, posts went out to mailing lists, Facebook groups and Fetlife forums asking people to take a survey.  The typical subject line read:

Why do you go to poly social meetings?

The content of the post varied.  The original post on the Fetlife forum Practicing Polyamory read as follows:

Movie nights, picnics, roundtable discussions, speed dating, happy hours and more -- there are many ways polyfolk socialize with others.

I put together a survey.

The survey does not track IP addresses and doesn't collect emails or names. It's as anonymous as I could make it. The last question asks you about your location but it's optional.

Results will be published here and on other web sites and mailing lists. I won't publish results by location as this might reveal someone's personal info indirectly.

I am hoping the results help group leaders get ideas.

I am hoping to get this survey posted on various poly social groups but only with prior permission of their owners/moderators.

SurveyMonkey allows only 100 responses for a basic (free) account.  I decided to stop collecting once I knew I had more than  100 responses in any case, but the limit was coincidental.

I closed the survey late on Monday June 24, 2013 with 101 responses.


Summary results are presented below.

The last question was optional and asked for a city entered as text without any suggestions.

Most of the responses came from Florida. The rest were scattered all over North America, England, Australia, and other countries.

Question 1 results


Question 2 results

Question 3 results

Question 4 results

Question 5 results

Question 6 results


Discussion of results

1. I have not shared the text results because one or more answers might indirectly reveal someone's identity.  Participants were promised anonymity.

2. I received private messages critical of the survey or asking about why the survey was arranged the way it was.  I think there were several flaws.  Question by question:

- Question 1 should have included "Community building", "To see what the community is like", and "to learn more about polyamory".

- Question 2 would have been better with an Other option and free text entry.

- Question 5 should have included Single as an option.

I regret not asking about children.  Q. Do you have children?  1. Yes, they live with me 2. Yes, but they don't live with me.  3. No.  4. Childfree by choice. 5. Prefer not to answer.

I regret not asking about other affiliations.  Q. Are you ... (select all that apply) 1. Poly  2. Swinger  3. Nudist  4. Fetishist 5. BDSM 6. Other 

3. I purposefully did not ask about gender or orientation. I am interested in feedback from group leaders who think this survey might have helped them. Should a survey like this one ask these questions?

Further discussion

Thanks to everyone who participated!

Please comment here, on the Fetlife Practicing Polyamory group,

 or send me an email,